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8:36 a.m. - 2006-09-13
Procrastination equals punishment
Could I just get out of my own way please? I still have not finished those freelance projects, and when I sit down to work on them, I find all kinds of other activities that make perfect sense at the time - like sleeping, or cleaning off the dining room table. But the fact is, I'm letting them hang over me to punish myself for something, though I don't know what it is. And I wake up five or six times a night and grate it all over my mind making it raw and pained. Just do it. Just do it.

Good, busy day yesterday - toured a school, reminded myself why I am here and thanked God for my healthy child. I spent alot of time with the woman I am going to supervise. She has clear career goals and is very young. Should be interesting.

Today I meet with my boss. I will be curious to see if we are meeting at the time we set or if I will again have to wait until she does something else. But I'm not bitter.

Andy was invited to a birthday party for the 6th grade sister of a friend of his. We like the family, and we love Andy's friend who is one of the funniest boys I've ever met, but the party is lunch, then the family will drive a pile o'the girl's friends (and Andy and the brother) about two hours away to the ocean to take three hours of sailing lessons. I don't know why this freaks me out, but I just don't want him to do it. In my sane moments (HAH) I think that he is too young and maybe I am keeping him from an injury or falling overboard; in my more usual moment, I am smacking myself for being overprotective and keeing him from a really fabulous experience. I have to RSVP this morning. I am probably going to say no. Big surprise.

The rest of this week is making me bananas. Tonight I have to go to a fund raiser for work; then its cub scouts; then it is coming home to work on the freelance project. Tomorrow is another day full of meetings and more freelance work. I hope to be done, done, done with that. Friday is my own, but I accepted an interview appointment. Oi. This weekend: Cub scouts and a birthday party.

Just do it. Just do it. Just do it.

A hui hu marama.

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