9:30 a.m. - 2006-01-20
Anxiety - Aisle 6
Still in this January funk. Here is what I am stewing about: 1. Job or no job? What the hell is going on? 2. Non-speaking friend. I just think there is still some answer or solution that I'm not seeing. I know - if I wrote into smart and sassy they'd tell me to dump the bitch. Or would they tell me I'm too rigid and mean? 3. I have gained weight and I can feel it. I am already large. I worked hard to lose weight and it has moved back in with bags of dirty laundry and undone homework assignments. 4. Spouse. We need to make some changes between us. 5. Motherhood. Am I doing a good job? Sometimes I wish there was a pause button so I could just have a few hours to myself without questions or requests to play. That makes me feel terrible. 6. Death. My friend lost her husband; my neighbor/friend's mother is no longer in remission; I think it is because this is the time of year I've lost the most people in - Spouse's sister, two of my grandparents; a college friend, a childhood friend;and it is after the holidays, so I'm more inclined to fear my parents' deaths after we've been together. Count my blessings Just keep swimming Remember it is Friday a hui hou marama
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