Get your ow
n diary at DiaryLand.com! contact me older entries newest entry

1:08 p.m. - 2004-11-12
Sometimes we all have to just get off the couch
How predictable I've become. I have my lists of stuff to do, get, wash, clean, sign, mail, wrap and sautee this weekend. I have company coming tonight, In-law D&O visits tomorrow - the FIL now has bed sores - huge surprise. Spouse and I begged him to move more, to get off the damn couch -but he refused. Now he has to go to a wound care center daily to be treated (my guess is that visiting nurses could do it, but that this is a way for the doctor to get him up and out.) Unfortunately, this means that the mil will have to drive him daily, and she is already grousing about that. See? I am hateful, and have little sympathy left.
I had two meetings this morning, one with the mayor of the city that I work in. He has some notoriety beyond this little city in a little state. He does some interesting things, and I suspect he is destined for higher offices. We are doing a project with him/for him on education and here is a thing that I have discovered: Most people want you to just tell them what they should do. Even people in high places. If they are working in territory that they do not feel they own - they just want to know what to do. I pair this knowledge with something else I discovered in my forties - most people are motivated by the fear of appearing stupid. So they don't say or do anything that might embarass themselves.
Next week is my birthday and spouse's birthday. We usually celebrate his birthday, then an "us" birthday, then my birthday. I am particularly uninspired this year. I have gifts for him, I have an idea of what I'll cook for him, but I have no idea what I want. Perhaps that is what this fall malaise that I am having is related too - I have no vision left beyond my lists. I am just vinegary.
It is snowing a bit outside - early this year, though it looks like the snow will stick tonight. I have company coming tonight, they will sleep over on their way to a book reading/signing not far from us tomorrow.
But here is a good thing: The daughter of a friend of my mothers is my age, and had been trying to get pregnant for several years, going through all the various procedures spouse and I did - she was pregnant last year, but lost the baby at 5 and a half months. We added her name to our list during prayers, Andy and I, and though we don't know her, her name is like the line of a poem in our night time ritual. We don't even know her real name, and pray for her as Ruth D's daughter. I kept meaning to ask my mother about her friend's daughter, and last night my mother called to say that she had seen the ultrasound pics of this woman's baby - a girl - who is due to be born in about six weeks! I like to think about that. This long oval of joy and sorrow push in at my chest, flowing round and round.
Time to cross some things off the list.

previous - next

|

about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!