9:51 a.m. - 2008-06-13
Love is awful
Happy, happy Friday dance! I am home today - we don't have to work because next weekend we have new student orientation, and then we HAVE to work the weekend. So I'm going to try on bridesmaids dresses this morning. Without sleeves. And without straps.
But first, news from the fifth grade romance front: I picked up Andy from his after-school program and he was in a good mood, but then when we got in the car, he said that a friend of the girl that he likes told him that the girl doesn't "Like" like him, she just like's him. Andy was sad about this and spouse and I did our best to talk to him and cheer him up, but he was still a little blue.
I know, I know - it is only fifth grade, and I suspet he's doing this because so many of the other kids are doing this, and it is the end of his time at this school, and I always want to cling to something when things draw to a close - even on vacations, so I suspect he is hanging on to something too. So, we talked about the fact that the girl he liked was going to a different school, and that he didn't know her that well, and maybe she was scared. He got that, but he was still concerned that she didn't like him. I reminded him that he hadn't been in class with her since third grade. He was just afraid that she "didn't like" him as opposed to "didn't like" like him.
Andy is going to try and talk to this girl today, and I realized that in all of this, he hasn't actually had a face to face conversation with her this year. They have only communicated through thier friends.
I kept hearing the voice of Annie Potts' character from "Pretty in Pink" saying "Love is AWFUL!"
I can tell him that it will get better and that he will have deeper, more meaningful relationships in the future. I can tell him that there is the heaven that is finding someone you are happy to spend the rest of your life with, and that it gets better and better and then you have kids and wowie, it is different, but even better then because you see the person that you love has created children with you and that you both love them so much and you love each other so much, you can't believe it. I can tell him that next year, he may not even remember this girl, but he might. And that doesn't matter right now does it? Because right now, this moment, he feels that pain of rejection in his 11-year-old, sweet-boy heart. And this is something he has to feel. It isn't about me aching for him and wanting to make it stop.
And there isn't anything I can do to take that pain away. I may be able to distract him, but he'll still feel it for now. And then he'll get over it and realize that he survived his first crush, only he won't call it that - he'll feel like he went through a new and peculiar experience.
I am so inarticulate.
We went to dinner with the neighbors and had a little "graduation celebration" dinner. The neighbors gave their daughter a cell phone (Andy will have to wait until the end of the summer); and we gave Andy some of his favorite anime books.
Spouse just called. He found lobsters, (that we can afford) so we'll have cold lobster for dinner tonight. YUM!
This weekend, the usual, plus father's day. Spouse wants steak and pecan pie. I got him so cool pajamas that have little lounge chairs on them, also a big jar of cashews, a Pink Martini (Sympatique); a Rameau CD of classical music and a vacuuming of his car.
And for now, that's all I got.
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